How it all began

4:05:48 Nim Bravewolf "features stunning turquoise waters "

4:06:08 Bravewolf Nim especially when you plummet into them from the bridge where you decided to end it all

4:06:15 Nim Bravewolf gives me the mental image of people arriving at the beach and just standing there looking at it, dumbfounded

4:06:19 Nim Bravewolf because they're stunned :)

4:06:32 Bravewolf Nim beaches of south zombies

4:06:37 Nim Bravewolf nice, yes

4:08:39 Nim Bravewolf you what I like?

4:08:53 Bravewolf Nim No, I don't what you like.

4:08:58 Nim Bravewolf pfft liar

4:09:02 Bravewolf Nim forbidden words?

4:09:06 Bravewolf Nim invisible words

4:09:21 Nim Bravewolf what I mean in particular though, is that I can say the most absurd and non-sequitor things to you, and you just roll with it

4:09:24 Bravewolf Nim attractive hats

4:09:28 Bravewolf Nim haha

4:10:09 Bravewolf Nim we should have our own show

4:10:11 Nim Bravewolf lol

4:10:29 Nim Bravewolf we need our own "wtf blog"

4:10:31 Bravewolf Nim haha

4:10:54 Bravewolf Nim "Stupid/amazing things from around the web and our heads"

4:11:00 Nim Bravewolf yes

4:11:02 Nim Bravewolf exactly

Jesus' swollen bastards

11:02:09 Bravewolf Nim: LOL http://www.aolnews.com/weird-news/article/depiction-of-jesus-on-cross-stirs-up-controversy-at-oklahoma-church/19441036

11:02:45 Nim Bravewolf: oh I read that yesterday

11:02:54 Bravewolf Nim: the one I commented on :D

11:02:56 Nim Bravewolf: it was a big topic in my IRC atheism group

11:03:08 Bravewolf Nim: “Jesus' swollen belly looks like another swollen body part. “ LOL

11:03:16 Bravewolf Nim: I haven’t been on IRC in eons

11:03:42 Nim Bravewolf: that is actually a perfectly legitimate style of iconography though

11:03:48 Nim Bravewolf: I don't ht ink they should change it

11:04:20 Nim Bravewolf: maybe put a little line across to show his six pack

11:04:25 Bravewolf Nim: I know but I will still snicker in a juvenile manner.

11:04:36 Bravewolf Nim: http://afa.net/Blogs/BlogPost.aspx?id=2147493408

11:04:50 Bravewolf Nim: linked from the first... wow. Aren’t you an asshole.

11:05:12 Nim Bravewolf: yes, I would too

11:06:07 Bravewolf Nim: I like how this person is claiming that marriage would solve the ills of the single, poverty stricken mother, but is promoting his agenda by focusing his pejoratives on the children.

11:06:23 Nim Bravewolf: so... you're young and some guy knocks you up abortion is a sin.. and
now they don't want you to get help either?

11:06:34 Bravewolf Nim: and then he gets to his real agenda: “It's time to communicate in policy and not just in words that in America, we expect you to save sex for marriage, to have children only within the marriage relationship, and that we will no longer force American taxpayers to fund the expenses of children they did not conceive and with whom they have no relationship and for whom they have no responsibility.”

11:06:52 Nim Bravewolf: " They are certain to grow up in an environment where they do not have the daily, meaningful and essential presence of a father."

11:07:03 Nim Bravewolf: uh yeah.. because all fathers are AWESOME

11:07:09 Nim Bravewolf: and they'll make your life great?

11:07:28 Bravewolf Nim: OH. OH. So children should be your *punishment* for out-of-wedlock sex because you can’t abort them but you can’t get any help for your situation either.

11:07:34 Nim Bravewolf: yeah

11:07:37 Bravewolf Nim: What a wonderful environment to grow up in.

11:07:39 Nim Bravewolf: way to make their lives worse..

11:07:50 Nim Bravewolf: next they'll claim that we should just eat them

11:08:11 Nim Bravewolf: "This year, taxpayers will cough up $300 billion to provide welfare to single moms,"

11:08:17 Nim Bravewolf: I highly doubt this number

11:08:28 Bravewolf Nim: Not only are you a punishment for your mother, you also apparently should be labelled with the term “bastard” so that other people can cut you out of their social groups, thus ensuring that the problem of single-parent poverty is a self-fulfilling prophecy.

11:08:37 Nim Bravewolf: yeah

11:08:55 Nim Bravewolf: and I love how he says that the US is overtaxed

11:09:13 Nim Bravewolf: the US is SO not overtaxed.. they're way down the line for taxes

11:11:16 Bravewolf Nim: I am all for reforming the welfare system so that people can’t abuse it. However, if you want to effect change, you have to give these people a way out and actually empower them to make their lives better - make working more attractive than welfare because they get more opportunities and their children have good childcare options.

11:11:37 Nim Bravewolf: you can't make it so that no one can abuse the system

11:11:55 Nim Bravewolf: because then people who actually need it will get cut out on the side of caution

11:12:05 Bravewolf Nim: I just don’t see this happening... you can’t tell someone to work if they have no place to put their kids.

11:12:09 Nim Bravewolf: yup

11:12:46 Nim Bravewolf: more sperm donor dads need to be forced to pay support

11:14:27 Bravewolf Nim: I agree that women who choose to have children should be evaluating what kind of life they can give a child. However, I don’t think that single parenthood is the root of all evil. He doesn’t mention what kind of help he thinks people who have lost a spouse should have.

11:14:50 Nim Bravewolf: yeah

11:14:52 Bravewolf Nim: what if you did everything right and things just didn’t work out?

11:15:00 Nim Bravewolf: and what about women in abusive relationships?

11:15:06 Nim Bravewolf: or ppl getting divorced

11:15:12 Bravewolf Nim: oh they should stay for the sake of the money- er, children.

11:16:32 Nim Bravewolf: hah yeah

11:18:58 Bravewolf Nim: so what if you have a couple of black eyes, a broken jaw and a few busted ribs every few months? The American people - the hard working two parent families (because no single parent works for a living - they all live on yachts collecting welfare) who pay their taxes depend on you to shut your mouth (you should - all those broken teeth don’t look good on a woman) and praise God for your home.

Of Lesbians and Proms

By now most people are cognizant of the furor surrounding Constance McMillen's fight to be allowed to bring a same-sex date to her prom and wear a tuxedo at said prom. After it was ruled that not allowing her to have these things was a violation of civil rights and it was also confirmed that the school prom was going to be held, McMillen and her supporters found that only 7 people, including Constance, attended the "official" prom while her schoolmates partied at a private "prom" on the same night in a scene reminiscent of the experience of Carolyn King-Miller in 1965.

Now that their asshattery is forever enshrined in popular culture, the Itawamba Agricultural High School staff and parents have shown some signs of scrambling to explain how they really had the moral high ground. Apparently the moral high ground included excluding disabled students, groping and girl-on-girl tongue kissing (it's okay to engage in lesbian sex at IAHS if it's to turn on guys).

To IAHS, Constance McMillen was a troublemaker who just wanted attention. They seem to fail to understand that it was their going to extreme lengths to deny her the right to attend prom with her girlfriend and in a tuxedo that focused the international spotlight on them. If they had just handed her a couple of tickets, this would have been just another red-letter-day for the local limo service and nothing else.

Constance could be an all-around bitch. She could have just wanted attention. She could just be a glory-seeking whore. I'm sure that there are a metric ton of them in any small town you can dig up out of the glory of the American South - or anywhere else, for that matter. What the people involved with the IAHS hateprom scandal don't seem to realize is that Constance didn't train the spotlight on herself - THEY did.

It's the kind of ostracism and hate that only Jesus could love. Or was that the Pharisees? Or maybe they're taking this from some other part of the Bible. Anyway, all the people involved in the anti-lesbian campaign seem awfully religious... they're all good church going folk.

The Internet is a wonderful thing. Even after this has been forgotten by the majority, bits and pieces of it will still be floating around long after McMillen's classmates graduate from college. Their god forbid that any of them go for a public career like politics and acting. Every time they turn around, the "private party" of 2010 will be around to haunt them. And I hope it does.

One of the positive things, though is that other students have followed in Constance's footsteps and, amazingly, nothing bad happened.

The Easter Bunny/Santa/Tooth Fairy Doesn't Exist... why are you crying?

"You broke my child's heart!" No, actually, you did that.

When I was but a wee bitchy tyke, I figured out that Santa didn't exist. It was not a fun time for me. I know that there are many people who figured out the non-existence of fantasy figures without material pain or distress. Unfortunately, I was not of that personality. I started crying and it was a long time before I could be consoled. It shook my faith in my mother and aunt and all the other people who told or implied to me that Santa was real.

No doubt, many people will say, "Well it's just a bit of fun! It's an integral part of childhood! Don't take it so seriously!" Well, when you're seven, you DO take it that seriously. Your parents/guardians are your entire world and what they teach you, you live by. When you find out that your beliefs about something are nothing more than a series of lies told to you by the people you are supposed to trust the most, it makes you wonder what else they are lying about.

My mother didn't intend to hurt me. She raised me the best she could and she wanted me to have all the happinesses and "magic" that childhood was supposed to come with. She didn't think - and a lot of parents don't - how it seems to a kid who has been raised with such exhortations as "Don't lie!" and "Be honest!" to find out that their parent(s) have been lying to them all along. She also didn't realize just how much I depended on that world of fantasy and how much I believed in it.

I find it painfully amusing how some people safeguard their lies with righteous wrath should anyone happen to mention that they buy presents or make Easter baskets or provide the money for the tooth fairy. Or if someone posts something on the Internet suggesting that their constructs are not real. Suddenly, this person "ruined" Christmas or Easter or whatever holiday. The parent never takes the blame for creating a fantasy world for their child(ren) that must inevitably be shattered.

Why don't more people teach their kids the concept of "the spirit of Christmas" or "we pretend that the Easter bunny comes to bring you candy", they create a fantasy world that can be shattered with a single reference to the truth. Better, it's a lot easier to explain why some kids get a lot of presents and some kids get little or none.

No doubt there are a lot of kids who took the whole Santa/Easter Bunny thing in stride and, no doubt, for them it wasn't a big deal. But how do you know if your child will take it badly? I'm not suggesting that making a kid believe in Santa Claus and the Easter Bunny will turn them into a heartless killer. I am, however, putting it forward that to do this risks hurting a child deeply if they really, truly believe, only to be told the truth on the playground or overhearing a casual conversation. What I don't understand is why anyone would risk hurting their kid like this.

No matter how much people want to create "magic" for their children, I think a lie is still a lie. And it's just as hurtful as any other lie. Dressing it up in "magic" doesn't change it.

Indoctrinating Your Offspring into Your Cult of Choice

It's a pretty well understood concept that children are intellectually moldable creatures. Challenge them to consider new ideas, and they can really surprise you with their original thoughts. My experiences with teaching children and having my own children has never ceased to amaze me when it comes to the creative ways that children can process information.

That being said, it's also amazing that when children are spoonfed fundamentalist dogma, for their formative years, how scary and rigid they can turn out. You can't help but wonder what sort of inflexible environment has to exist for a child to give up their curious nature and their sense of empathy for other types of people.

I think that when you condition children that there are concrete right and wrong beliefs to have and right and wrong types of people to BE... that you're setting your child up for a hard life. No matter what you believe to be the "right way" to live your own life, it's important for a child to question things in their environment... whether that's questioning things that parents believe in or not.

It's surprisingly easy.. some would say disturbingly so.. to find the results of damaging kinds of childhood environments all over the media; one can only hope that these kids all grow up to learn how to think for themselves.

'Racist' parents fight for children

Wal-Mart Decorates Cakes for Nazis

Bubble Wrap: Now With More Anger Displacement!

There was once a woman who had a 2 year old son who crawled through a dog door and drowned in the family pool. Undoubtedly a tragedy. Certainly a reason for this woman to dedicate her time to informing people of the dangers of pet doors. This much I can understand and even heartily sympathize with.

However, Carol Ranfone is taking it one step further. She wants the law to require pet door manufacturers to put a warning on their products that tells parents that their children could crawl through the door.

If Ken and I had ever thought the pet door would pose any danger to our children, we never would have installed it. We thought he was safely contained in our home and had no idea he could get out.

WTF?

Saying that you didn't know that a child could access a dog door is basically saying, "We are incapable of understanding how the real world works." One wonders why these people are advertising their claimed inability to understand basic physics - it does not bode well for their ability to care for future children if they don't understand that HOLE IN HOUSE = ACCESS POINT.

While I appreciate that the Ranfones went through a horrible experience, I hardly think Carol Ranfone's argument says anything except that they cannot accept that they could have been so horribly careless as to leave their dog door unlocked/unblocked. The PetAccessDangers.com (the Ranfones' website) collection of news only serves to illustrate that there are a lot of careless ex-parents out there.

I can certainly understand how this kind of thing can happen - just because it was careless doesn't mean I think the Ranfones should serve jail time. Sometimes "they've suffered enough" is a valid reason to withhold further judgement. However, I don't think society's forbearance should mean that Carol Ranfone should be able to affect an industry in order to assuage her guilt.

Something as obvious as a dog door being accessible to human beings should not have to be noted on the packaging so Carol Ranfone can convince herself that she was not at fault for her son's death.

Don't Tell My Mom!

It's funny how in some contexts we never grow up.

When I was growing up, there were all kinds of things that I didn't want my mom to know. I didn't want her to know that I smoked; which she may or may not have, I was never sure how much my excuse of "all my friends smoke, that's what you smell" worked. I never wanted my mom to know that I smoked pot; to this day, I'm sure she doesn't know. And I never wanted her to know that I got a tattoo.

When I was a teenager, way back in the olden-times land of the mid 80s, the current tattoo culture hadn't started yet, at least it hadn't started where I live. According to my mother, if you had tattoos, you were either a biker or a prostitute. I was obsessed with having a tattoo and started visiting shops when I was about 16 years old and when I hit 18 I got my first piece of permanent artwork. And spent the next year of my life wearing nothing more revealing than t-shirts around my parents so that they couldn't see the silver dollar sized mark on my skin.

They did eventually see that one, about a year later, and my mom FLIPPED OUT. And over the years, as my art collection grew, she or my dad would occasionally get a glimpse of a new bit and they'd freak out all over again.

So, fast forward to the recent past of this past Saturday and me sitting in my friendly neighbourhood tattoo parlor with my son. For his 18th birthday this week, his gift from me was his first tattoo.

I am now seriously living in dread of my mother finding out about this.

I know, at almost 40 you shouldn't care what your mother says about things; but anyone who has a mom who does this kind of thing knows that it's not that easy. I *know* that at 18 years of age, any teenager has the right (at least in BC) to legally acquire a tattoo without parental consent. But somehow stuff like this is always my fault.

I'm wondering how *my* decisions as a teenager weren't her fault though.

Maybe, if I hear about this from her, I'll have to bring that up.